Thanx, Andrew, for a great rendition of "Our Chief Reader, Rosenstein" by Dan Kennedy. I mentioned this Calculus Song, Parody, Filk, or whatever you want to call it, on the AP Calculus ListServ a few months ago as I had lost the words. The song was about the solution to AP Calculus AB Free Response Question 88AB6:

Let f be a differentiable function, defined for all real numbers x, with the following properties

(i) f '(x) = ax^2 + bx

(ii) f '(1) = 6 and f "(1) = 18

(iii) int(f(x),x,1,2) = 18

Find f(x). Show your work.

I finally found the lyrics sheet I was looking for in my desk, so my students have had the dubious honor of singing this song in class! Since I mentioned it on the ListServ, I have been asked several times for the words, but I haven't had a chance to share them until now. What follows are the long, sought-after lyrics:

Let f be a differentiable function, defined for all real numbers x, with the following properties

(i) f '(x) = ax^2 + bx

(ii) f '(1) = 6 and f "(1) = 18

(iii) int(f(x),x,1,2) = 18

Find f(x). Show your work.

I finally found the lyrics sheet I was looking for in my desk, so my students have had the dubious honor of singing this song in class! Since I mentioned it on the ListServ, I have been asked several times for the words, but I haven't had a chance to share them until now. What follows are the long, sought-after lyrics:

*"Our Chief Reader, Rosenstein" by Dan Kennedy*

*Sung to the tune of "My Darling, Clementine"*

*Peerless leader, dirty deeder, our Chief Reader, Rosenstein,*

*You're our hero, you gave zero to a kid we thought was nine!*

*In a classroom, in Topeka, on the 13th day of May,*

*sat the class of Mrs. Bentley, for their AP Judgment Day!*

*After months of AP HomeWork, Betty Sue was well prepared,*

*she moved quickly through the problems, never nervous, never scared!*

*AB6 was tough for some, but Betty Sue was feeling fine,*

*as she smugly wrote her answer, she was sure she had a nine!*

*Then the tests were wrapped and bundled and were sent to ETS,*

*where a group of expert graders would do justice, more or less!*

*In the world of Mathematics, sometimes things aren't meant to be,*

*so, alas, at George's briefing, Betty Sue was Sample G!*

*All the readers at the briefing gave her 9s with pleasure when,*

*they could see she had four x cubed minus 3 x squared plus ten!*

*George was wincing with displeasure, and his head just gently shook.*

*Then he sighed, "That's not what I had, so let's take a closer look!"*

*"In the third line, she had f prime where she wants to integrate.*

*Then she never quite recoups it, so she can't get more than 8!*

*"In the 4th line, she miscopies, and a 12 becomes 11.*

*I'll admit that it's a pity, but her 8 just fell to 7!*

*"Now she sees that a's 11, but her a and b don't mix.*

*So, she changes b to match it, that's too bad, she's down to 6!*

*"Then she puts those terms together, for a function to derive.*

*But a plus becomes a minus, so she drops from 6 to 5!*

*"Then she integrates quite nicely, but we dock the kid once more.*

*For her C is clearly missing, so her 5 is down to 4!*

*"In the next line, by some magic, she is solving for a C.*

*But she never justifies it, so we drop her score to 3!*

*"If you closely check her limits, where the integral is through.*

*You will see she had them backwards, so at most she gets a 2!*

*"Now her error, if consistent, could not yield the constant 10.*

*So her right C is the wrong C, and we burn her once again!*

*"If she puts it all together, this poor girl could still get one.*

*But recall, she's lost a plus sign, now it's back, so she gets none!"*

HTH, I hope you enjoyed our little filking interlude!

Learning with Technology,

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